Tuesday, May 7, 2013


I go in for pre-op paperwork etc at 10:30 this morning. I am filled with so many different emotions about this surgery. Of course fear is #1 and anxiety is running a close second. Once I get past those feelings, I start to wonder if I should have hope on this surgery. Sometimes I close my eyes at night and imagine the surgery was a huge success and infact my right tube was blocked. I imagine it is now open and working along with my uterus being healthy and cleaned out. This will make the difference............................

After so many failed treatments and so many losses, this will be what changes for me.

Then my common sense kicks in and tells me that we need way more then this surgery to make a difference. Either way it is a good starting point. 

My husband is starting to get excited about seeing Dr. Kim. I think he is starting to believe she can really help us, one way or the other. I think so too, but I also put so much trust in my current RE and look at where we are at now. 

So many emotions.......................................... 

I am back from my pre-op. We ended up doing an u/s because of questions raised on whether we should remove a fibroid I still have. Since my uterus is retroverted, the fibroid is located on the very back and out of the way. My doctor said he is almost certain that is not the reason for our miscarriage and infertility. If we decided to remove that one, I would end up in the hospital because he couldn't sew it back up fully through a laprascope. He believed at this point it would do more damage then good. So I agree with going forward on LAP and hysterscopy at this point and leaving that fibroid alone. My lining was at a 6 and I had a 42 mm cyst on my right ovary. He is going to drain it during surgery.
He also asked if I was still planning on seeing Dr. Kim in Chicago. I told him we already sent records and are waiting for an appointment. He is very interested in what she finds. Of course I told him that three years in and all my miscarriages, something HAS to change. I can't keep doing what we are doing with the same result.

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