Thursday, April 3, 2014

Updates, This & That

Thought I would take a few minutes and get back to those of you who have been asking me questions about my treatments etc.

Lovenox-
I did end up hearing back from Dr. Kim and she agreed with my doctor here in OKC. I have reduced my dosage from 80 mg daily to 40mg daily. In a way it has been somewhat scary, but I do believe that we are all making the right decision. I haven't experienced any bleeding since last Friday. Although I check every five minutes.

OB & High Risk-
I should be hearing from the OB this week to schedule me for my first appointment around ten weeks. He has also already contacted his colleagues that are MFM and I will be hearing from them soon. I guess this is a very common practice when carrying twins.

The Triplet-
Thank you for all the support on losing the third baby. In all honesty, the thought of having three babies scared the hell out of me. I am still working on processing the fact we are having two. Al and I always knew that multiples were a possibility going through treatment. It is definitely not common though to have all three eggs fertilize with iui. We beat all the odds on this one. I do believe everything happens for a reason.

Symptoms-
I was a little worried about my lack of stereotypical symptoms. I didn't think I was having symptoms, but it turns out I really do have a nice little list of them.
  • Insomnia
  • Heartburn
  • burping
  • shortness of breath
  • on and off cramping
  • headaches
  • extreme hunger
  • congestion
  • bloated
  •  
I don't have any morning sickness, sore boobs or extreme fatigue.  My doctor assured me yesterday while looking at the babies that I am indeed pregnant and feel very lucky I am not sick.

Fear of Twins-
I am sure that most parents of twins have a fear. I was not one of the people who thought it would be so cool to have twins. In all honesty with the immune issues and all the failed cycles were we had multiple embryos, eggs etc. I didn't even think it was a viable option for us. I am scared. I want to do my best to make sure they are healthy in the womb and can make a safe delivery. I am scared that financially we will have issues paying for two babies. Our house is so small! I don't even think we have room for one crib in the spare room and I know there isn't room for two. There are many fears. So any twins moms out there, please let me know this is a normal feeling? Am I a horrible person for having these fears?

Treatment-
All of my immune levels are pretty close to normal now. Dr. Kim is still wanting me to do my infusions every week though. I will continue the infusions until end of second trimester. I will also continue the blood thinners and steroids. I truly believe with all my heart that this is reason we are at this point right now.

Well that was my this & that for the day. Sitting here 7w1D pregnant with my hoppers and feeling so lucky! So very lucky! I am still in daily shock that this happened to us after four years of struggling.


14 comments:

  1. This is all great news, thanks for letting us know what's going on! I love hearing all the different stories and treatment plans. I know I am not a mother of twins, but I am a twin and my mother has always been open about her feelings of having twins. She has mentioned many times that she had loads of fear, financial concerns, all of it. I am sure it's VERY normal to feel unprepared or fearful of the unknown. She also was never shy about telling us stories about how hard it really was. Which I think is great. I don't like it when people sugar coat things, give me the honest truth even if it sucks. So she said it was difficult, but those days where my sister and I were full of joy and always had a best friend to play with were the days that made it so good for her. I love being a twin, and my sister is my hero. I am sure many twins could say they have a soul sister(brother) with a creepy cool connection! :) Hope that gives you some perspective! love ya girl! xox

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  2. Thank you So much for that feedback. This is exactly the stuff I want and need to hear. I also love that it is not sugar coated, but real and there will be some great days and some not so great days.

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  3. Twin mom here. All your fears are TOTALLY normal. It is double everything. The cost at first is a lot because you need all this stuff for them. We have a group called http://rarepairmoms.com/ here in OKC. Check that out. You can get lots of advice from them. There are consignment sales for multiples too. You can find that info on that website. Just Between Friends is pretty good one too. As you can tell, I think buying used to save money is the best way financially. I didn't even care about the finances when it came to knowing I was having twins. I was FREAKED out about carrying them. I was so scared. But I did pretty well. I only made it to 33w5d, was put on bedrest at 30 weeks, but I had a 3 and 5 year old so I was very naughty on my "bedrest". Mine were only in the NICU for 12 days. My advice is to eat a lot of protein, drink a lot of water, and when they tell you to slow down - do it! Multiples are a CRAZY ride, but it is so fun. They have such a special bond. There's truly no way to describe it.
    Check out these resale groups on facebook too- I've already seen some double strollers roll through a few times:
    https://www.facebook.com/groups/1429746590576844/
    https://www.facebook.com/groups/379970595464592/
    Enjoy every minute. You are so lucky you aren't sick! Enjoy that hunger, it's the only time in life where eating for 3 is just fine and dandy! lol! I sure didn't take that lightly!!

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    1. Thank you so much Kristina for the great information. I am definitely scared of carrying them. I guess right now it is so early that I try not to think about it, but the reality will hit me soon enough. I will also check out the groups!

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  4. Thank you for the update as I have been wondering on your treatment. Although I didn't have to take a ride like yours to get pregnant, I know someday I will know someone who will benefit from your information.

    I can only imagine the scary yet rewarding ride of twins. We have 2 girls that are 24 days shy of being two years apart. With a husband that drives truck (he is only home every 3-8 weeks) I find myself going crazy most days...lol

    From the looks of this community, you will have a great support system for questions. As always sending you and Al all my prayers and positive thoughts for a happy and healthy 9 months.

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    1. Thank you so much for your support also. I am so blessed to have my husband working an 8-5 M-F job. I know it will take both of us to tackle this :)

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  5. I know you will find a way to balance everything with having twins. Sometimes I look at friends who make so much less money than us and have 3+ kids and I wonder how they make it all work, and I guess when you have no other choice you just get creative!

    Happy 7 weeks :)

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    1. I told Al the same thing. I also know couples that make much less money then us and have more kiddos. I am going to start researching different ideas to save money.

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  6. So you already know my story. And you've seen photos of the Beats (I will send you more very soon, promise).

    To start, all you are feeling is very normal and very rational. Being a parent of multiples is hard, financially, physically and even emotionally. The pregnancy was very different from what I ever expected (never mind the immune issues) and a lot of people were unable to support me as they clearly had no clue or were comparing their experience with a singleton, which is very different.

    What saved me was finding other multiples parents, via online and through the local clubs. I really recommend the clubs because to actually see these parents in action helped calm a lot of fears. Here's a link for finding a local club:http://www.nomotc.org/index.php?Itemid=43&option=com_clubsearch

    The other thing that helped was having a good doctor. My original OB was clearly ill-equipped to deal with my pregnancy. My MFM group was amazing. Even then, I found I needed to be on top of reading and asking questions. Hence the other moms.

    Finally, as far as all the gear: there are options. For example: currently the Beats sleep with us in our bedroom. Two full size cribs with our bed clearly wasn't going to work (we have ~1000 sq ft condo). What we ended up purchasing was Delta Riley Mini-cribs. We also rearranged our bedroom so that it's become a sleeping area. The second bedroom has become the family closet. When we explain this to most people they look at us like we're crazy, but the multiples parents tell us about their set-ups and how they are similar. My point is that you'll find you can be very creative and know that finds can change as they grow. And if you want more examples, I'm more than happy to share.

    For now, take it one step at a time. I promise that you can do this. And being scared isn't a sign you can't, it just means you're being realistic.

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    1. Thank you for the information. I was actually looking at the mini cribs earlier! I thought about that or just having them share a crib while they are so young. We are planning on buying a new house in about a year or so.

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  7. You are not a horrible person for having these feelings. Period. I'd say the vast majority of twin parents felt the same way when they first found out (I know I was scared shitless!) But I know you, and you are really good at doing your research! By the time they arrive you will be in really good shape.

    When it comes to costs, I've found that yeah, it is more expensive than having 1 baby --- but you won't be going out to eat or to the movies very much anymore, so things tend to balance themselves out financially once they are here. One thing that you will need to think about sooner than later is the cost of their care -- will you go back to work and get a nanny? Do you have family that can help out with daycare? Or will you stay home with them? I think once you can figure that part out and find out how much money you'll need for that, you will feel a lot better.

    You'd be amazed at how little stuff you really need when they are tiny. You can start with 1 crib and buy a 2nd one later on. Most of the big stuff your family and friends will buy for you. And you don't need 2 of everything. Sure, formula and diapers will be costly but you can use the generic versions if you're comfortable with that (we did for formula - saved us a TON). And you can get tons of discounts when you have multiples. (here's a start: http://twiniversity.com/twin-parent-resources)

    When it comes to twin resources -- it looks like you're pretty covered already. Email me if you want to talk more.

    Finally, I have to say that I love having twins. Having two incredibly special, funny, sweet, independent, smart, inquisitive boys at once is kind of mind-blowing. And when you get that first "double hug" -- watch out. Your heart will melt more than you ever thought it could. I wouldn't trade having twins for anything. Sure, it's hard as fuck sometimes. But it's also incredible.

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    1. I won't lie, the cost of daycare has been our biggest worry. Fortunately here in Oklahoma the cost is MUCH lower then other places in the U.S, but still expensive. We will both continue working and I will need to find daycare. I do wish we had a family member or a friend willing to take the job, but I found out that twins scare most people. I had a few offers if or when I ever got pregnant with one :) those have since expired :)

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    2. You should also consider an Au Pair. If you're planning to buy a new house anyway, if there is a spare bedroom or extra space in the basement for a small bedroom, you can hire an au pair from abroad to live with you and care for the twins. This is the service that my twin club recommends and it's national. http://www.aupaircare.com

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  8. All will fit in its place once they come. Having 2 is better than going through another treatment for a sibling . don't worry too much:)

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