Well my first OB appointment is Wednesday and I can tell you that it can't get here soon enough. For the past two days I've had a overwhelming fear that the babies aren't alive. This is probably due to the dreams I've been having. Yeah I know that sounds totally morbid, but I just can't shake the feeling. My doctor last week told me that my chances had dropped to 3% and for most people that would be a green light to accept a pregnancy. I could never understand reading blogs of woman who were pregnant after years of infertility and losses and understand at a certain point how they couldn't just be happy and accept their pregnancy. Well now that I am in those shoes, I totally understand. It has been hard from the beginning not having the symptoms that is suppose to go along with a twin pregnancy and all the bleeding/clotting etc. Everyday I tell myself it is going to be okay and the babies are fine. This is a very hard place to be and now I do finally understand. I think I am just now starting to realize how much infertility has stolen from me over all these years. I guess all I can do at this point is wait until my appointment on Wednesday and ask him if he will give me an ultrasound. According to the nurse that is not standard practice on the first visit. If he doesn't I will call my RE and see if they will let me come in for one. I am sure after all the tasty pies I sent them today, they will be more then happy to :)
Well this Friday we get our new travel trailer and I am really excited. We love to camp and try to go at least a few times a year. Now that we are expecting twins, there will be no more Mexico trips or nice sunny beaches in our future for a few years. Therefore we decided to upgrade from our little pop up to a nice travel trailer. Here are a few pictures of the model we are getting!
As of today I am 10w5d pregnant. Only a few more weeks and I will be in the "safer" zone. Then we can become more confident and actually start planning for twins.