E2 Levels

So I just got a call from my clinic. My E2 levels are 987 and the doctor is dropping my Follistim again. Tonight is 100 iu and tomorrow is 75iu. I wont lie I am starting to get worried,. My doctor is VERY conservative. I know that if he doesnt get this under control, they will cancel my ivf cycle. The RN told me not to be worried that they will get this where it needs to be and that I should be happy I am responding so well. She also told me I have to take into consideration that I have alot of follicles and that makes a huge difference. Jeez i am really starting to get stressed out.

Stims Day 5 (We missed a few)

I just got done with my u/s & bloodwork for Stims day (5). Looks like we missed a few on my baseline. As of this morning I have 24 follies on left and 14 on right.  With that being said there is only a cluster of follies around 9mm right now. I think the nurse told me about 16 of them. The remaining are smaller then 7, so not all of them will be matured when we do retreival. I am very happy with those numbers though. She said I am responding very well. My lining is at a 7 today and I will update with my E2 levels later in the day when I recieve them. Today I am causiously optomistic.

Pinch me...............

I know that everything im going through is probably, perfectly normal or I hope so. I am about 7 days from retreival and at times I do know this is happening, but the majority of the time its like a dream. Going through the process of getting prepped for ivf is unmistakeable, you know its really happening. Most of the time I know that I am going in next week to have this done but its like I dont truly accept it. Does that make any sense at all? This morning driving to work I thought " im going through all of this and its very possible to get my AF within a week after transfer" you know? All of this time and preparation and it could be just like another cycle. Please dont get my wrong, I am not being negative about this at all. Its just hard for me to swallow the fact of getting pregnant after many failed attempts and 2plus years of trying. I guess I am used to the fact of things not working. I have almost accepted that fact?  Then my next thought is...... so far things are going picture perfect in this cycle. I heard so many stories about woman bleeding on bcp, not me. I am responding very well to stims and have been told I have at least 29 follicles at my baseline. I have been to this rodeo and I know that it doesnt always end well. Maybe the fear is finally setting in about failure, idk. My one hope is that we are at least able to have embryos to freeze. In a way its almost like a safety net of some type for me.  Im just really nervous, excited, scared, and hopeful.

Ok im done. Thanks for listening. Im sure this is very common among woman going through ivf. I will update tomorrow on my u/s and E2 levels. I have acupuncture twice this week also and day before retreival. I have to say that the money I have spent on acupuncture is well worth it! If not anything else, it has really helped my anxiety levels.

Update: I went to the bathroom and looked at my stomach. I have bruises all over! Ok yes I might be a little weird, but I am excited! Almost another right of passage with ivf patients :)

Holy Follicles!

Stims day 2 and well my E2 levels are already 388. I am decreasing Follistim tonight. I asked if they are concerned that my levels are already so high? She said not at all they think I will have lots of eggs. Kinda excited about my u/s Wednesday morning.

Stims Day 3

Actually as of right now its still day 2 since I dont do my injections until evening time. I did ask my nurse about that this morning. She said the reason they want me to take injections together and at night is because if we need to change any medications after bloodwork then I can do it that day and not have to wait until the next day (makes sense to me).

I can honestly say that my stims are going fantastic. Headache and some dizziness seems to be the other side effects as of now. Since im doing (3) injections per side each night, my tummy is a little sore. Actually the Lupron needle is the worst. The insulin needles are so small and dull that it never wants to penetrate my skin and I have to jab the hell out of myself for it to go through. Follistim is wonderful and Menopur is fine also. Lets just get rid of that evil Lupron, it has been nothing but a pain in the butt since day one.

My boss said "your having surgery next week?" I replied yes Joe. Then he said what are you getting done again? My reply " I am having all of my eggs aspirated. Then he looks at me and says Oh my god that doesnt sound fun. LOL the price you have to pay for a baby :) I have been very up front with my boss and coworkers about going through this. Infact I have even educated everyone, including my boss of infertility and the cost of going through ivf, emotionally, and financially. Looking at my calendar I about fell over, realizing my retreival is going to be next week! All this time I thought it would never get here and now its right around the corner. Ive been having the same conversation with my ovaries also just so they know how important it is to grow and hopefully they get the memo.

Will update my E2 levels when I hear back from clinic. Before I forget, congrats to all of the BFP's within this last week, wow!

Stims Day 1

Tonight was night 1 of stims. My doctor told me the other day that once I start my stims the side effects from Lupron will be better. I decided to do all three shots in one side a night and alternate. Yay!!!! getting so close now.

 

Update on Personhood Act (Part One)

So I went to the press conference held at the State Capital today. I was so moved after hearing the doctors, advocates and also patients who have went through ivf. I wont lie, I cried and cried some more. I dont understand how lawmakers in the State of Oklahoma can justify pushing this bill through. I dont see how they can look at "Susan" who had cancer at the age of 19 in her ovaries and survived that while in law school, married and found out the only way she could have children was through ivf. How in the holy hell do you justify this bill? Let me tell you what "Mr. Big Pants, who only cares about getting re-elected does. He comes up with a short bill that is 7 lines to use as a smoke screen to get the real bill to pass right behind. He uses the Parenthood Act as a pro-life/pro-choice and then here comes the kicker, you know the one that puts restrictions on ivf and birth control also ectopic pregnancies. Yeah I found out so much today.

Tuesday, February 29th from noon until 3 at the State Capital is a protest. I will be at this protest with my sign and a witty saying on it (still working on that part). I will be there with disgust on my face for the 38 assholes who passed this through the Senate. I will be there with disgust on my face for our Governor who is so pro-life she believes a woman should die before having an abortion. I will be there showing disgust on my face for a bill that state NO woman shall have an abortion, not in cases of rape nor incest nor medical necessity. Now will someone tell me how this is constitutional?  Will someone please tell me when Senator Crane went to medical school? How he understands exactly how conception works? Oh I forgot, he didn't go to Medical School but he obviously has some right to tell me that I don't mean shit! He has the right to tell me that I have absolutely no say on my body. Well Senator Crane, I disagree and I will be there Tuesday and along with my witty sign, I will have a sign that promises your ass and the 37 others along with Governor Mary Fallin will not be reelected! Or at least you will not get my vote and any other vote from any other woman who pays tens of thousands of dollars to be able to bring a baby into this world for us to love.

Thanks for listening to my rant this evening. I just want to know what in the hell has happened to this world? Where are woman's rights in this country going?

Oklahomans please sign!

http://www.change.org/petitions/persons-against-personhood-in-oklahoma?utm_medium=facebook&utm_source=share_petition&utm_term=share_with_facebook_friends


This is a petition for the Personhood Act in Oklahoma. If you cant make it to Capital to voice your concerns, please, please sign this petition and let our lawmakers know that this is NOT OK!
Come on ladies lets be proactive about our bodies and let government know they cant have control of my uterus!

Media Alert for Oklahomans

Media Alert
Oklahoma Infertility Physicians and Patients to Explain Their Opposition to SB 1433 and HJR 1067 (Personhood Legislation)

WHEN: Friday February 24, 2012
WHERE: Oklahoma State Capitol Room 432B (Capitol Press Room) at 1:00pm
... SUBJECT: Medical professionals and patients opposing Personhood legislation (SB 1433 and HJR 1067)
WHO:
Atlee Breland (Mississippi): Founder of Parents against Personhood, infertility patient and mother of three; leader of Parents Against MS26, a grassroots organization integral to the defeat of Mississippi’s personhood ballot initiative in November 2011.
Dana Stone, MD (Oklahoma City): Obstetrician-gynecologist in private practice.
Eli Reshef, MD (Oklahoma City): Reproductive specialist, Medical Director, Bennett Fertility Institute.
Oklahoma Patients with Infertility.
“Personhood” legislation”, giving any biological entity from a fertilized egg on the status of a person, has been introduced this year in the Oklahoma legislation as SB 1433 (Crain, Billy) and HJR 1067 (Reynolds). The medical community and patients view such legislation as dangerous, carrying a broad range of destructive consequences to health care in Oklahoma, particularly devastating to infertility treatments.
Personhood legislation will criminalize the practice of complex infertility treatments, including the handling of embryos in the in vitro fertilization (IVF) process. Infertility affects 10-12% of all couples in Oklahoma. For many of them, IVF is the only procedure become parents. IVF, as practiced to the current standard of care, will leave physicians open to criminal prosecution if embryos are classified as legal “persons” Doctors providing IVF will consequently stop offering IVF treatments for fear of criminal prosecution and couples living with infertility in our state will be denied the opportunity to build their families.
The Oklahoma medical community, including the Oklahoma State Medical Association, as well as national organizations (including the American Society for Reproductive Medicine, American College of Obstetrician-gynecologists, and RESOLVE :The National Infertility Association), strongly oppose Personhood legislation.
Interviews are available after the press conference.

 

 

I will be attending tomorrow. I hope to see any of my fellow Oklahomans there with me. Remember this is your uterus we are fighting for.

Back Up Plan

Last night driving home I looked at my husband and decided to make sure we were on the same page. He doesnt say alot about our upcoming ivf. Of course I talk about it all the time throughout the day. I have my blog, on facebook I am involved with Attain and Resolve and I also know a person or two in real life struggling. So I can honestly say that I am very involved daily in my infertility and treatment course. So last night I wanted to really get a feel for where my husband is at on this. He is still leaning towards transferring one embyro the first go around and if that doesnt work then transfer two on the second. I was on a similar page with him, but now im not so sure for the following reasons.

1. If we dont get any frozen embyros that means another fresh cycle and I would perfer not to be on Lupron until hell freezes over (if I have a choice)
2. From all the reseach and blog following I have done, you seem to have a better chance with two, even if one is the textbook perfect embryo.
3. If at all possible I would love to only do one cycle of ivf and be able to achieve pregnancy ( I also know the odds of 1st cycle being successful)

Now with all that being said (see #3) I am a complete realist and I know the odds of our first cycle working. I wanted to prepare my husband for the fact that we may not get frozen embryos, that is is the in most cases the "exception to rule" so with that being said we may only have two fresh cycles. On our Attain Multi-Cycle we paid for (2) fresh and (2) frozen. I am truly hoping that we can at least get (1) frozen cycle out of this. I know many people are probably thinking that I should just concentrate on this first ivf and not worry about anything after that. Let me make it clear that I am planning, I am a planner and I want to make sure everything is in place.

I also discussed with my husband last night that it is a possibility that none of the cycles work. At this point we need to realize that our journey is over. We have talked extensively about adoption and it is not for us. So we need to also prepare for the fact that if this doesnt work we have to move on with our lives (as hard as that will be). By the time we get ivf paid off it will be to late to start all over again. I hope and pray this wont be an option for us in the end. With that being said I have to be realistic that it is possible.

Strangly enough I am pretty calm at this point. Actually so much better then I thought I would be at this point. I have thought about all of the possibilites going into this and dont think that I will be caught off guard through this process like I was with our iuis. I have learned so much since that point. If I had anything to do over again, I would have skipped right passed iui and went to ivf. Lesson learned on that one :)

50 followers. Wow thank you ladies so much for all the love and support. I dont know where I would be without it.

* Before I forget, I know my titles for blogs are so lame but I am NOT a creative person at all :)

Oops forgot: Yes I know im all over the freaking place today, sorry. Last night I walk in my acunpuncture appointment. The first thing he always does at beginning is take my pulse. My pulse always runs really high usually 110 or so. Well last night it must have been through the roof and he asked what was going on. My reply was "Oklahoma politics and our new interstate" LOL so we had a nice long chat about Personhood Act. I almost feel like instead of "occupying wallstreet protestors" we need people at the capital fighting for rights to our uteruses! I am so passionate about this and in some ways that is really bad. I get very emotional and my blood pressure shoots through the roof. Now that the House is outnumbered 2/1 Rep over Dems, this law is a shoe in for Oklahoma and there is nothing I can do about it. I have never been so absolutely frustrated and angry in my entire life. Ok end of rant now.